EklektikosByStar

Star shares her writing with the world.

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I am a Wordpress rookie. As promised, come hell or high water, I finally got my “baby blog” going. For the time being, it is not interactive. No, it’s just a place for me to share my written words, and for others to take what they like, and leave the rest. At the start of this endeavor I am almost 66 years old. Allegedly “retired”, I never lack for inspiration in a world pulsing with options…and distractions. I’ve never understood the concept of boredom. While for some it is regarded as an unavoidable reality, I seem to teeter toward an intolerance of it. And, as a person who seeks compassion, I know that condescension besmirches my soul. We are all different, wired as we are by our respective predispositions, the environment we’re birthed into, as well as all future pit stops and destinations. This word ramble on the matter of boredom reminds me of journaling back in the seventies, e.g., when I took an Introduction to Philosophy course… Were I enrolled in said class today, all of the above pros would likely be entered into the journal. Now, as then, I would not necessarily reach any conclusions; but I’d do a spectacular job of contemplating…the contemplation!

Unfriending & More In The Era Of tRump

September 29, 2018 — Unfriending & More On Facebook

My experiences with Facebook-related conflict have varied; and I’ve, thus, not handled them the same. I offer up an essay for you, Mary…and anybody else who cares to read it.

One episode involved a friend of a friend who wanted to be MY friend. At that time my settings enabled him to comment on my posts; but I was not in the mood for this ranting egotistical, yet articulate, bigot to go after me. First, I ignored his friend request, then I changed my settings, so that my public posts only get comments from my Facebook friends (on my timeline). I observed a post of his (elsewhere), in which he clearly had figured out what I’d done to restrict his access to my personal online space, and I ignored him.

Meanwhile, another Facebook friend, a guy who was briefly married to an old girlfriend of mine, was blurting out comments aimed at me that others were finding offensive. The topic was political, but he was mocking me…using some pretty blunt adjectives. Generally I was putting up with his (likely) drunken-state nastiness, as I knew his anger was coming from a pretty sick place…and I did not feel it necessary to call attention to what an ass he was being. But then I noted alarm in comments from others, especially one woman (a cousin of mine) who clearly was bothered by his demeanor towards me. She shared some of her thoughts privately, reminding me that he was being abusive. Given that it would not be appropriate for me to divulge publicly how the disease of alcoholism likely factors into his online persona, I did my first ever “unfriend”. I did not write to him about it, I just did it. However, I publicly posted a grainy nondescript facial photo of him without his name, taken from a high school yearbook, and announced my first “unfriend”…

And then there is one of my best of friends (since third grade) that I never “unfriended”… but for whom I lost respect. Until the era of tRump, I was able to tolerate the great divide between us. But on more than one occasion I provided fact checks in my comments to debunk the nasty anti-Muslim posts by my devout Christian friend. I even explained how posting untruths spread lies exponentially, that lies spread faster than truth. She would never pull anything I called her on. She never apologized. She essentially giggled and plowed forth in lock step with The Fuhrer’s agenda.

Of note is her invitation, 2-3 years back, to visit for the holidays. I said publicly I’d get back to her on that. Then privately I acknowledged that I knew she could do that easily, that exposure to my direct opposite frame of mind would not rattle her, that it would run like water off a duck’s back. Unstated was my understanding that she’d be praying incessantly for my way of thinking to change, and this would bolster her. Stated point blank was my admission that I could not make the visit, as I could not treat her with respect. She thanked me for being honest, and was genuinely appreciative.

But from that point on, there was a fading effect. While some will insist that true friends cannot possibly let that happen, that a relationship can thrive and be apolitical…I say that’s great for those who have such a friendship. But for me it would be like cutting off one of my arms…and then encouraging me to clap my hands.

Perhaps one day she and I will touch base via facebook…However, for some time now her Facebook has been offline. Maybe eventually she and I will meet face to face. But currently I have to let her go, as quite frankly I cannot shake how much I lay a shared blame at her feet…for this diabolical “gift from god” President that she enabled.

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